Thoughts at 39 weeks

For anyone who knows me, you know that I am 9 days away from my estimated due date--which means that I am 2 days away from being 39 weeks pregnant. I am sure there are people who are irritate with how self-involved I am or how everything I seem to talk about revolves around myself or my pregnancy. It's not my objective each day to make sure I announce to the world that I am pregnant and super close to having a baby- but I am an excited person and have always been a person who likes to express herself. Between facebook, twitter and blogging, I think I'd be able to make a pretty good argument that we are all a bit self-involved. My thoughts are simple: if you aren't interested- then don't read and follow.

I can admit that my mind is 100% focused on what the next day to 2 weeks will bring and how they will drastically change my life. I am not the best friend I could be right now. I am not the best teacher I could be right now. I am not the best student I could be right now. Even though my lovely husband would surely disagree, I am not the best wife I could be right now. While I am completely consumed with the fact that I could become a mom ANY DAY NOW, I ask you-- can you blame me? This isn't an easy change that I am soon to be faced with. It's not something simple like a haircut. You either do it or you dont. THis is a life that my husband and I created that will soon be joining us and changing everything. This is a change I am eager and nervously awaiting.

This brings me to part 2 of my blog post. I am 9 days away from my due date and feel fantastic. I have good energy and feel comfortable. I did zumba 3 times a little over a week ago and am still pretty active. The only "problem" I have is that since I am probably too active, I am retaining a lot of water and swelling pretty bad. My doctor told me I need to rest more- so that is what I am trying to do. The other "problem" I have noticed is my back has started to hurt between my shoulders-- probably because I am hunched over and don't realize it.

Now--keep in mind that I took a personal day on Friday because the kids were a nightmare on Thursday and I wasn't willing to put myself through that again. That being said, I have had Friday, Saturday and Sunday to relax....which very well could be giving me a distorted memory of how "fantastic" I feel. Being at school all day long is really hard on my body and by the end of the day I am usually exhausted. One thing that does worry me that a good friend/co-worker pointed out is how tough it would be to be at work all day long and then go into labor that night. I hadn't really thought about a scenario where I have a rough day at school physically and emotionally and then possibly go into labor where I am expected to...well....labor for hours to then produce a child. Hmm. I am going to see how this week goes...but if I don't have him this week, I am probably going to have to talk to my doctor and principal about this coming Friday being my last day.

At this point, there is not a sub for my maternity leave. While this is something that would normally freak me out....I honestly am not that stressed about it. Once again...my mind isn't on that right now. The school will find a sub. The students will find successs. I will be back in April. Why stress? I can't let the fact that there is no sub for me pressure me to stay if I dont think I can physically or emotionally handle it anymore. I have to have my best interests (which would be me and caleb) in mind. When I spoke with human resources, they basically told me I am expected to keep working until my due date/arrival of my son unless my doctor says I am not fit to work. Um...you are joking...right? I have an appt tuesday and will speak with my doctor and principal after that.

....I think those are all my thoughts. Basically, I am not getting my hopes up that I will have him within the next 9 days. He will come when he is ready...or I will allow the doctor to induce me the 2nd week in February.
Guess we will wait and see! :)




Also.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY SISTER!!! I LOVE YOU!!!